Humorous Learner Gifts

"Sarah's grades are excellent. She got A+ in 'Yogi Berra: Philosopher or Fall Guy?,' A in 'Dollars and Scents: An Analysis of Post-Vietnam Perfume Advertising,' A in 'The Final Four as Last Judgment: The N.C.A.A. Tournament from a Religious Perspective,'

A Puppet Named Juan

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

'Good girl, Carol - now hands up all those who have lost their pens.'

'Ah, it's so precious to witness a child learn how government actually works...'

"I'm still pre-literate."

Having been born with a birthmark that looks exactly like Asia and the Mideast, Russell was able to ace the geography portion of the SATs.

'What did I learn in school today? You'd better sit down.'

'Do years 4, 5 and 6 cover the other foot?'

"Quantum Physics"? How am I going to learn all of this stuff? A bit at a time?

Scientist has note on chalkboard: E=mc2 + 6% sales tax.

Master's Degrees of the Universe

'And from this point follow me very carefully.'

Education and Apprenticeships

'I think the computer has a crush on me. It asked me to remain after class.'

'I'm afraid I still have more questions than answers.'

"In pre-school I was an overachiever. Now, in first grade, math is threatening my reputation."

"I've learned from the past. Now can we move on?"

"What do you mean, it's not an educational toy? I'd have to learn to ride it!"

'Ms. Shelby, I think you're spinning out of control.'

"And today children, Homer is going to show us his 'pressed fly and bug collection'."

Young Galileo

String Theory for Beginners.

"I've got the ninth grade chemistry class this term."

'I will now read the results of my experiments in fruit genetics. . .'

Global Education

"First the lady asks if I want to take this book...then she says I have to bring it back in two weeks!"

Party Schools...

'To better prepare you for the future, I've replaced the letters in your alphabet soup with Chinese ones.'

First Piano Lesson

Do Not Pass. Just like high school.

"Please, Ms. Sweeney, may I ask where you're going with all this?"

Concerned about the poor geography skills of U.S. students, Westfield School District found a creative way to address the problem.

Smirking or Non-smirking

"It's a clear case of RLS: Repetitive Lecture Syndrome."