Educational Humor Lover Gifts

'Could I have some computer time to troubleshoot this problem?'

'Of students surveyed, 64% prefer English and 32% prefer math. The fact that these numbers do no add up to 100 may help explain why.'

"What's one sixth of three quarters?" "It's so small why bother?"

A Puppet Named Juan

'Ms. Shelby, I think you're spinning out of control.'

'The thing I most need to improve the educational outcomes of my class are some bright students!'

'Dad...why would I ever want to get out of the first grade? I love first grade!'

"You can't be needing another break - the kids have only been back a week!"

"My report is on the three branches of government - checks, balances, and subpoenas."

'I don't think A Levels are getting easier - I nearly failed physics!'

Master's Degrees of the Universe

'It's the alphabet in 3-D.'

'That 'multiplication table' seems contrived to me!'

'Mr. Conway came here without an appointment, didn't you, Mr. Conway?'

'Dad, what are you doing in sex education class?'

'I finally understood 'negative numbers' when the teacher said they're just like the US budget deficit.'

'Good morning, class. I'm your substitue teacher, Mrs Hilda 'Old School' Crenshaw.'

String Theory for Beginners.

On a hot day in 1941, scientists uncovered the only known remains of the elusive nerdosaurus rex,

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

Freind: 'Misspelled, anything helps.'

"Is this a 'GOTCHA' question?"

"I'm going to prove that Math comes in handy later in life."

"He wants to study bacteria to relate to the counter culture."

'The doctor says he's going to have to give you a few more tests...'

'Do years 4, 5 and 6 cover the other foot?'

Math Teacher

Four olives and a toothpick on Newton's Cradle.

"The principal has sat in on so many of my classes, I'm thinking of giving him the exam."

We interrupt this program to bring you, Tommy, a message from you teacher. Have you finished your report on frogs?

"There are no dumb questions, Billy, but there are plenty of dumb answers!"

Dept. of Engineering. It's a well-written paper, but a "gyroscope" is not a device for looking at tiny Greek sandwiches.

"Class, this is David. He's our new financial exchange student."

'Did you know there's a river in Brazil named after Amazon?'

'People, get a half-life!'