Humorous Eaters Pillows

Lesser known greek gods,

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

'Nowadays we want all our food to be ethically sourced, Personally I'd be happy if it was all chocolated sauced,'

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

Filet minion

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

Better Not Squash.

Cat eats date.

Cooking with Pierre

'We're at an Italian restaurant this time, Kevin -- those are breadsticks, not giant-size chopsticks.'

Weight Loss Counselor, out for a 400 calorie lunch.

"Sorry Sir, but what exactly were you expecting to be served when you ordered the 'early bird special'."

'I was like you once, full of ambition! AND LOOK WHERE IT GOT MEEE!'

"Here's the pub-grub you ordered"

"Tonight, we'll be eating hot dogs with a mustard-ketchup-and-pickle purée, accompanied by peas lightly sprinkled with ketchup. Then fettuccine al dente with a ketchup sauce, followed by applesauce maison with a dollop of you know what!"

'I thought a perfect martini would cover the 'well balanced' requirement of my night to cook.'

"Man does not live by chips alone. There's also guacamole."

'Trust me, Madam, that fish is fresh!'

'OK, who ordered the prawn cocktail?'

"The other waiters just spit in the food of rude customers, not in their faces!"

'So this is a kitchen!'

'You'd better cut it into six pieces I don't think I could eat eight!'

"Say hello to my little friend!"

All our meals digest easily forming a soft, mushy stool with just a hint of acridity.

Couple in restaurant, "Sorry it's slow, Chef's got the runs"

'How many Breadsticks have you eaten?'

"You're losing your everything."

The Leaning Tower of Pizza

'How did you get your pastry so thin?' Steam roller.

'Do you do the squished up little balls that taste of fish - or are you the wrong ethnicity?'