Humorous Award Enthusiast T-Shirts

"I'd like to thank Ed for not cutting the grass and farmer Moley, who didn't slaughter me."

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

Showbiz Awards

Police Feline Unit

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

Covid Inquiry / Enquiry

Cariactures

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

Faster, Georges, faster!

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

Speed Dating for Turtles

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

Selling lemon latt�

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

Do Not Resuscitate

Doctor examining Easter Island statue.

'Cannonball!'

'Actually, accounting is an exact science.'