Humorist In Religion Pillows

Speaking in tongues for the Deaf

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, I mean, alpacas? What are they? It’s like Bob Seger mated with a llama."

'Holy-Kanoly' makes his infamous 'Leap-of-Faith' jump.

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

"Sometimes Peter I wish it would just stay as water."

"You call this a constitution?"

"This Adam and Eve thing -- Is there a warranty?"

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

"I certainly trust this meal is kosher."

"You say I can move mountains? Right now,it's all I can do to turn over a new leaf!"

'It's good to see you, Mr. McWit, but you do realize that today is neither Christmas or Easter?'

'The Brothers of the Order of Saint Orson, patron saint of fried foods'

Sermon Applause.

"Does the ark have wifi?"

United Church of OMG

'Please take your receipt!'

"Since we now have a leaking roof problem, it might be a good time to schedule baptisms."

'This whole Noah's Ark business sounds like a quota system to me!'

'This business about the meek inheriting the Earth -- can't anything be done about it?'

'What are you giving up for Lent this year?' - 'Anchovies.' - 'I thought you hated anchovies?' - 'I do. Care for a cookie instead?' - 'Lent is supposed to be about challenge and sacrifice!' - 'Play to win, Baby!'

Religious Maintenance: 24 Hr Callout.

"Pastor Bob is the leader of the flock, son, not the herd."

Priest with the Pet Devil.

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

The Vatican's undercover mission to Antarctica, and some endangered penguins.

A woman in prayer

'Dad, if God rested on the seventh day, who milked the cows?'

"Bit big for a cherub, isn't it, Brother Ignatious?"

'Perhaps he's heard we're losing our churchwarden.'

Who says religion can't have a sense of humour.

"...I'll send you for an amniocentesis."

'When I asked for your favourite Saint, I didn't think of someone like Michael Ballack, son.'