Humor-loving Aliens Gifts

"Captain, can you come to the transporter room please?!"

"Everything tastes better when it's cooked on the grill."

Man, my cat sneaks into the weirdest spots.

Earthlings, show us your sporting interests. This is golf. Hit the ball with the club. This is tennis. Hit that ball with the racket. This is volleyball. Hit that ball with your hand. Hitting, hitting, hitting. It's all so violent. How do you relax? We hit the hot tub.

"People of Earth – can everyone see my screen?"

Alien attack in the 1950s

"Word has it Earthlings have been using some of our people for cruel scientific experiments."

EARTH DAY. Whatever.

New York Stock Exchange. Wall St. To err is human, but this is ridiculous!

Planetary Invasion Supplies Store - Abduct Tape.

"This is where you'll be sleeping."

So that's what they mean by the "vacuum of space"! Vvrrrrr. WHOOSH!

"What happened?....Icing on the wings!"

"On what planet do you imagine this would be funny?"

An astronaut with a little alien drilling into his helmet.

"Feeling very much at home here, Houston."

"Captain...I'm detecting Hemorrhoids off our starboard bow."

'Planet earth is doomed! They all look like your mother!'

'Oh, nothing's wrong -- I just expected Earthlings to be taller, that's all.'

Sid's favourite hen was so broody, she tried to hatch out a meteorite.

'From Earth? -- You're not that Geraldo guy, are you?'

Alien catches clothesline on trip to Earth.

"Welcome to the end of time!"

'I've heard of space heaters, but I've never seen one before.'

'I'm lucky that kid called!'

'My folks are away and I have the ship. What do you say we go out and do some crop circles?'

"I'll probably hate myself in the morning."

'The best place to land is Southern California -- they're used to it.'

'Terrific!... You wait for a billion years, and they send three at the same time.'

"Even men from other planets reject me."

'I'm not saying he's neurotic, but he has serious left-and-right hemisphere issues.'

We interrupt today's "The Price is Right" episode to bring you breaking news

"Stop complaining. If you hadn't spent all day in a donut shop you wouldn't have to lose 3.5 stones so we could lift off."

"God, the sun is driving me crazy."

Who's laughing at the granola bar I always keep in my purse now?