Humor Finders Pillows

'It's all very well this 'The early bird catches the Worm' business, but I'm nocturnal...'

Playing Fetch.

"And when the canyon fills up, that's it; herd immunity."

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

12 O'clock was 'I'm a tractor time.'

"So, tell me a little bit more about this house training you mention on your CV."

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

baby sweetcorn...

Invasion Of The Summer Aliens

'Fetch.'

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

Due to his low center of gravity, Jake is the greatesr broncbuster ever!

ACME INDUSTRIES NEW PRODUCTS DIVISION, 'The best part is, it can repossess itself!'

'The circle is complete!'

"I'm not having it if it's been genetically modified."

'Hold on just a few more minutes. I want mine medium well.'

A sheep dog has stacked the sheep four high - 'He used to be with the circus before he came to the farm...!'

'The plumber said he can't come right now, but promised to put us on his 'wading list'. Cute, huh?'

'Been Away?' A piece of bread looks at a piece of brown toast as if it's got a suntan.

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

Transylvanian backpackers.

Giraffe Umbrella

The Runaway Horse

A caveman paints from life

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

"Four years of dental school only to tell all my patients 'Don't worry about any tooth issues - they'll just fall out and be replaced, anyway'."

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

"It's a letter from the Vatican. They say that whilst walking the streets without stepping into dog poo is nearly as miraculous as walking on water, it's not sufficient to canonize me!"

"Remember that time you tried to kill me?"

"Hue More Church Candlelight mass 7:00pm - 8:00pm"