Hummus Aficionado Pillows

'Ah, Garbanzo, truly you are a noble bean.'

"Care to try the dip? It's posthummus."

The Origami Society...

"You know what they say, time flies when you're having rum!"

'Camel'

"Hungry? I'm ravenous, Norman, I could murder a lentil cutlet."

'We're out of blackbirds -- how about four-and-twenty hamburgers?'

"The carpet really brings the room together."

"I'm here because I keep bumping into old friends. Like, literally bumping into them."

'Stanley Possum was not sure if he should continue to play dead or play one of the living dead.'

"USA map"

Possum Army HQ. Here's the casualty report, sir --- You have to take it with a grain of salt, of course.

'This is quite common. You've eaten so many sausages that you've turned into one.'

"Not gelato – hummus."

"I made dinner!"

'As you close your eyes and relax...' - '...allow your body and mind to attune with the universal consciousness...Just hum.'

"I'll race you the last inch."

Country Pub Walk

'Some of the women are asking if the manna is gluten-free.'

'There goes the scourge of this county.'

Skunk Trophy

Hemp Bombs

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, I'm 66 years old: and I going to be as crabby as you? - Rolf. *Actual reader letter. Rolf, this is really a sad, unfortunate letter. It seems unlikely you can ever achieve any reasonable level of crabby if you're the kind of loser to send such a whiny question. Great crabs are born, not made! Guy probably won't even make a decent curmudgeon. Not sure that's what he's hoping for.

You asked to see me, boss? Yes, Rudy. We have a serious problem here. I'm going to need you to stop humming the 'Star Wars' theme 24/7. Disney is notoriously litigious. If they catch wind that your publicly performing the theme, they may sue the café for royalties. Daaaa ... daaaa ... duh-duh-duh ... daaaaaaa ... daaaa ... duh-duh-duh ... Wait, what? If you cost me my livelihood, I'll do to you what Han did to that Tauntaun.

"...And the humus is that good?!!"

'Ben's disappointed. He thought it said 'stud'.' (Ed's Spud Farm).

"Good news—the economy is still sluggish!"

"And while we're here, do you have a rug for my husband's head?"

Crusty old Bachelor on Christmas Day

"We should clean this up. It's a lawsuit waiting to happen."

'Try some -- it's 'om mani padme hummus.''

'It was so cold on that day that the very rum froze in my barrel!'

Smoking Snail

Unsuccessful holiday ideas - Happy Slug Day.

"The song in your heart is fine, but the humming from your head really annoys people."