Humidity Manager Gifts

"Perhaps you could turn the humidifier down just a bit, Dear!"

Let's get organized

The Solar System (after deregulation)

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

'Senior management wanted me to raise morale so I made Lionel from accounts 'office jester'!'

"According to this article, snoring can result in justifiable homicide."

'You never compliment me when it's tidy so I figured you wouldn't notice when it's a tip!'

Housewife feeding her washing machine with a brief.

A Day In The Kitchen

"By labeling it, I control it."

'Your house is spotless, your children are well behaved and dinner was delicious. How do you do it?'

Hassled Mother.

"This looks like a job for 'Margarita Man!'"

Your energy bill is enclosed. You might want to sit down.

"Not tonight, Jon. I have to clean for the cleaning lady."

'What have I made for dinner? A reservation at the restaurant down the road. . .'

'Oh, I plow the fields, Greta takes care of the house, and young Johan, here, maintains the website.'

Separation Anxiety

'I'm not sure my heart could take the excitement.'

"I'm going to be vacuuming, if you want to go into the farthest room and start asking me questions."

"I just got a text message from our dehumidifier. It says it doesn't know how much more of this rain it can take."

"I like keeping bees, but it's so hard keeping all their names straight."

'It's not the global warming it's the humidity.'

'Since hooking our generators up to your exercise machines, we've cut our fuel consumption by 25.'

"Did you remember to do everything I asked, even the small things I said in passing that didn't sound like real requests?"

A woman's work is never done!

'Dinner in tumble dryer - gone to see therapist!'

The Complete Cycle.

"Okay, you two! Clean up the house and do the laundry while I take the kids to school!"

'You're three o'clock cancelled, the Parson deal is ending, and your husband wants to know if the dishes are dirty or clean.'

'We share the load - she cooks it, I eat it.'

'Really, it will be fine. Go home and give it a try. Wash lights with lights and darks with darks.'

'That's my mom... she's sort of a CEO, an action committee, and a janitor all rolled up into one.'

Hot Cross Bun

'...and when I did finally take out the trash, she locked the door behind me.'