Houseplant Appreciation Day Gifts

'Honey, have you watered the philodendron lately?'

"Maureen Alsop is leaving her magnolia, and her delphinium and her cats with us this weekend."

'Esther, is it possible, just possible mind you, that your green thumb has gone berserk?'

...gon make you sweat...gon make you groove

Water the hydrangeas twice a week and trim as needed. The bromeliad only needs to be high-fived on Saturday, but you can give it high and low fives anytime you have a spare moment. Just, whatever you do, don't give it a "too slow" or it will turn inward and begin shutting down.

Bonsai tree held up by matchstick

Thanks

"No, dude. Smoke the grass first. Then eat the candy."

"I don't know the Latin, but the common name is climbing onion."

Couple using thier new garden hose in the rain

Money Plant.

"I can tell it's new because it's alive."

'I'll just put them here until the danger of frost passes - probably next April'

A drooping plant is watered via an IV tube.

"This one looks as though it could use a little nurturing."

SPOONING CACTI

"Remember that half-dead sansevieria you put out on the balcony back in January of 1994, pal?"

"You can tell when people don't have pets, because they start to look like their plants."

"I think you've overfed the plant!"

House plants

The Houseplant Cemetery.

"Here's the new smart plant...it tells you when you're overwatering it."

'Oh my Gawd! He's a weed!'

'Oh yes I talk to them all the time. Except the aspidistra. Not since the argument.'

"May I remind you that our prenuptial agreement called for me to take the plants?"

Being-convinced your plants always know what you're thinking phobia.

'I SAID you'd threatened to throw them out once too often!'

"Wouldn't this one look nice shrivelled up in the kitchen?"

"There's a house-plant round here somewhere."

The Ugly Plant

The Houseplants vs The Kids

House Plant Party

In the houseplant cemetery.

"You spoil that plant!"