House Husband Life Pillows

'I'm a house-husband.'

Shepherd and eurydice

At the end of each day, Gary had approximately 7 minutes of free time – which left him feeling very vulnerable.

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

Killer Executive Suits.

Larry's used art

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

"I built this tree house for my kids. But it's so private, I've decided to use it as my home office."

"The data looks good, sir, but the vibes are mucho heavioso."

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

"Hold it right there, ma'am! If you get too close to the artwork, I'll have to ask you to leave the gallery."

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

Mum and baby both have pacifier.

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

"I know what this is, it's what mum and dad call 'working from home'...

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

'Are you finished eating yet, sweetie?...Guess that answers THAT question!'

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

Barbequer wears apron with 'Beer in -beer out' slogan.

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

"Talk nerdy to me."

"He's got no clue how easy he has it compared to his ancestors."

"Stephen and I are today's special."

"What's a patent?"