House Husband Life Pillows

'I'm a house-husband.'

Shepherd and eurydice

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

At the end of each day, Gary had approximately 7 minutes of free time – which left him feeling very vulnerable.

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

Larry's used art

Killer Executive Suits.

"I built this tree house for my kids. But it's so private, I've decided to use it as my home office."

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

Mum and baby both have pacifier.

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

"Frankly, now that he's an obnoxious teenager, I find it more and more difficult to muster the urge to protect him..."

"I know what this is, it's what mum and dad call 'working from home'...

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!

"What's a patent?"

Barbequer wears apron with 'Beer in -beer out' slogan.

"Talk nerdy to me."

"He's got no clue how easy he has it compared to his ancestors."

"Stephen and I are today's special."

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"