Househusband Pillows

'It's your husband. The baby won't burp for him.'

'I was home schooled. It stands for 'Master of Bedmaking and Aerobic housecleaning'.'

"Are you sure the doctor said it takes 14 weeks for your leg to heal?"

"You look great. One problem though: I'm the one who goes to work."

"How about once in a while you stay home and warm the nest, and I'll forage for grubs and worms!"

"Gigot de sept heures."

"Your Momma's rich and your Daddy's good lookin' so hush little baby, don't you cry."

"'Macho Soap'! For the house husband who wants red, raw, rough hands!"

Dear Diary. . .bored with nothing to do, be glad when Doris gets home from work!

'Let's play house. You do the cooking and cleaning and I'll go to the office.'

'How should I know how things are at home, I moved into the pub a month ago.'

'It's your husband. The baby won't burp for him.'

'No, the woman of the house is at work. May I help you?'

"Oh no! Not Polynesian again!"

'Don't blame me - It's my husband's cooking!'

'Honey, I'm home - for good.'

Domestic Stuntmen

Shepherd and eurydice

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

At the end of each day, Gary had approximately 7 minutes of free time – which left him feeling very vulnerable.

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

Killer Executive Suits.

Larry's used art

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

"I built this tree house for my kids. But it's so private, I've decided to use it as my home office."

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

"The data looks good, sir, but the vibes are mucho heavioso."

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

"He's got no clue how easy he has it compared to his ancestors."

"Stephen and I are today's special."