House Expansion Enthusiast Pillows

'We added on to the couch.'

Why it's bad when home owners change their minds about the bathroom's location late in a building project.

'How do you like my new, deep plush carpet?'

'You've reached McWit Quality Construction. If your foundation has cracked, press 1, if your plumbing is leaking press 2, if your house is collapsing, press 3 ...'

'We've knocked out the interior walls to improve our home Wi-Fi coverage.'

A DIY disaster.

Hardware Store Tools Wrench

Building Blocks.

"The white flag means he gives up and will finally hire a professional to finish the renovation."

"This is what happens when you award the contract to the cheapest tender...."

Your Home Remodel Team

'My building inspector just doesn't understand me.'

Building a company.

"It's a miracle I was able to build this desk all by myself. I'm not so handy."

'I think this is deep enough for the foundations!'

Engineer on the move.

'Have you got one of those things you use to knock nails in...?'

'I figure that if I sell just one, I can retire.'

Wallpapering with Nails

'Oh no. Another major code violation decision.'

'Guess they're still fixing the street.'

'Uh oh. I can see another few hundred will be added to your bid.'

'A baby brother? — I'm not ready to make a commitment like that!'

Handyman Christmas tree with Tools.

'Old mother hubbard -- your cupboard is now bare.'

"When we remodeled, we decided to go with the granite countertop."

"It's not so much a fixer upper as a tear it downer."

"I thought you were out front telling the fence company how to do their job."

'We're waiting for an estimate that doesn't make him do that.'

"I hear you've got friends in high places...?"

"I'd like one of your bucket and spade holidays."

"They've got insulation to die for!"

"Can't we just get some load-bearing wallpaper?"

'Would it have killed you to go with a store-bought model?'

'If the GPC built office blocks!'