Hotel Explorer Gifts

"These were taken on some of my favorite layovers."

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

I love the Shard

The Scanner Of Love.

I travelled to get away from it all. All I got away from was my luggage.

Disinformation booth.

"Rule #1: don't offer to carry anything!"

East End Maps.

Bankside

"Rockefeller Center."

The leaning tower of Pizza.

'Under the Trees- Regent's Park'

December 26 - Vegas, office (post) Christmas party.

Hotel mini-bar.

'What a bargain!'

"At these prices, what do you expect?"

'I'm sorry, but I can't tell you which room the star basketball player is recovering in.'

" ....you didn't say wanted one that worked."

"My husband's a lawyer. He's always losing cases."

"She barks once for drugs, twice for weapons, and ten times for candy bars."

New York Gondolier

Frog and toad rage (Two cockneys fighting).

After talking one stranger to death, Velma starts in on the next.

Pirates on holiday.

"Yeah, but it doesn't smell like a bomb!"

The mint on the pillow? Why it's complimentary my dear, Watson!

Paris Hilton

'I'm not waiting for luggage; I just bring the kids here to play.'

'No wonder you can't relax! Seven hundred miles in one day!'

"This is de ja vu all over again. I lost my shirt at the Taj Mahal in Atlantic City."

'I'm from Health & Safety...... I wonder if I might have a word....'

'Pack this yourself, Miss?' (Nelly the elephant at customs).

Never choose a vacation spot by its posters.

"It's our neighbor. He wants to borrow our GPS tracker."

'They've got $5 tables everywhere here. Where do you feel the luckiest?'