Hosting A Conference Pillows

"This kind flies around. Or do you want to rent a monotone speaker for your conference?"

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

Inclusive speech

The interested bystanders.

"Nervous about this morning's presentation?"

'Complete sentences?? Jeez, how verbose can you get?'

"I love these off-site business meetings."

'Well ladies and gentlemen, I'm sure my little talk has made you all think'

"Now this chart should clear up any confusion you have with the report."

"I don't think the guy with the business-card cannon has ever been to an actual networking event,"

"They make an awfully big thing of cookouts."

'Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking...'

"We serve danishes because that's just how I roll!"

I've been looking forward to this the whole year: It can get lonely out there...

I work for a not for profit business. Mind you, two years ago it was a 'for profit' business.

Conference Pears

Wearing a sales chart as a name badge.

World Food Summit - No food and drink allowed in the auditorium.

'Time management seminar. Start: five-ish.'

'He was hosting a business dinner for 300. Those were his last words.'

'Is that a suspicious package in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?'

'Thanks for flying in for the meeting.'

'And in conclusion.'

Business coach hiding in speach desk.

'Yeah, you have lips like Mick Jagger ... ok, back to the teleconference.'

'Let me present today's speaker.'

'Thanks for having us and I'm really sorry about the cheeseball. Honestly, I didn't realise I was meant to share it.'

Is that one of those wafer thin computers?

Unintelligible speaker at Subway Announcers Dinner.

'You think he overheard my last lecture on tax code revision?'