Hospitality Industry Professional Pillows

"...frankly, Mrs. Roach, I think you'd get more business if you changed your name."

Coffee Cartoon - Espresso Machines

" ....you didn't say wanted one that worked."

"Any idea how long your family might be visiting?"

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

"This place is one of New York's best-kept secrets."

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

Cardiac Recovery.

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

"I've tasted better myself, but you've got to admit the service is good."

"She'll have a Shirley Temple, and I'll have a Shirley Temple's mother."

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

Courtyard of the Hotel de France, Montreuil.

"And how is last week's tilapia tonight?"

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

'Tomorrow's special is fish, so wear the flounder suit.'

Frank and Ernie's Diner. We're all out of pressed duck, sir, but I can put the squeeze on some chicken for you.

"You've ordered comfort food. May I recommend a comfort wine?"

"In addition to the regular menu, today's specials are . . ."

"What's happened to Quiche?"

"Valet park only"

"Are you sure you want to see the kitchen? The chef is naked."

"So, you want me to go all the way back to the kitchen just to get you a menu...? Couldn't I just give you a link to our, online menu?!"

Prawn Cocktail Please

'Waiter, could I have some more water right away?'

"The candy on the pillow is a nicety of the house."

Womb service: A special room service for pregnant Women

Seafood: "Of course our food is fresh."

"The mint on the pillow was nice, but I'd prefer a chocolate fudge brownie."

'Would you folks like sparkling water or tap water?'

"I’ll have something for you as soon as Table Seven sees the entrée prices."

"This is a little awkward, but you've been our guest for a while now, and we all have work in the morning..."

Would madam like me to send over the sympathy steward?

The Suite Hereafter

"I only recommend the 24 oz. Prime rib for big fat guys."