Hospital Staff Party Gifts

"Hmmm...looks like the surgeon left behind some paperwork."

Doctor organises medical documents into 'poked' and 'prodded' piles.

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"This position has become very important to the company."

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

'That's our mission statement.'

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

"I spent all day learning productivity hacks"

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

21st century water cooler conversations.

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

'I really enjoyed my stay in the hospital - I never get served breakfast in bed at home.'

"Don't forget to leave me a wakeup call so I can get the worm!"

"The meeting will come to order."

Here and There Trays

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

"Ok, do we agree the minutes of the last meeting?"

That shows business confidence.

"That report on corporate redundancy... I'd like it in triplicate."

Sign - Halt manager crossing

Party Animals.

"No training period, but you can purchase my instructional video on line for $49.95."

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

"The good news is that we do have a little wiggle room."

'They sold the company in 2001? I was wondering why things were slow.'

Gerry, there are more accurate ways of balancing the petty cash.

Man at desk with two in-trays reading 'urgent' and 'too late'.

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

'I guess every team needs a creative renegade.'

"The meeting will last until lunch, or hell freezes over, whichever is longer."

'Office Woofers. For the quiet and obnoxious boss.'