Hospital Happy Hour Gifts

'Morale soared when we installed the Nurf Basketball.'

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

"This place has the best happy hour."

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

5pm Happy Hour. 6pm discussion: what is true happiness?

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

'No standing while room is in motion.'

Happy Hour

Clown waits for 'Happy Hour' to begin.

"Think we'll still make happy hour?"

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

Beers

Best Before 5th Pint.

A shop selling "Ice-cold Vodka" in 31 flavors.

Joe's 'Take Responsibility For Your Own Actions' Bar.

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

"Stranger, you're sitting in the boss's personal spot. That's why they moved the dart board over your head."

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

"He took eight shots on the 19th hole!"

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

I'm freshwater. Make it a margarita without salt.

"How was my day? I'm still calculating the little victories minus the humiliations I normally suffer."

Ask not for whom happy hour ends. It ends for thee.

"As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from restless dreams, transformed into a monstrous vermin, he thought to himself: never again bourbon and tequila in the same night, and this time, I mean it."

The Reaper's Arms

"Not much. Just enjoying my post-lunch bounce."

"By 'dress down day', most of us mean not wearing a jacket!"

"Quick, I need a drink. Someone just called me Ma'am."

"It's really important to me, as an artist, to make you feel like drinking more than usual so I get hired back."

'Okay then, what's the price break on TWENTY drinks?'

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

'Beer's more than just a food -- it's a comfort food!'

"In addition to the regular menu, today's specials are . . ."

'The way I see it, drinking is its own reward.'

'A man has to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink!'