Hospital Hallways Wanderer Pillows

"I never imagined I'd be up on my feet this soon."

"I expect a speedy recovery,"

"Okay, I've got lousy bedside manner, but I draw a smiley faces on all your prescriptions."

"You are here, but you should be in class!"

'We've been told to get families more involved in patient care, he'll need a bath and lunch in about 30 minutes.'

'I'm sorry, but I can't tell you which room the star basketball player is recovering in.'

'Which arrow points to my office?'

Hospital Visit

Elderly lady about elderly man: 'We met in ICU. We had a rheumatic encounter.'

'There's been a little mixup, Mr. Root. The computer has the virus not you.'

"I would not recommend you bypass heart surgery."

"I'm sending you to someone who's less squeamish."

"We must be in the wrong wing."

'You want a second opinion? -- Oh, a big shot, eh?'

'Let's order one more MRI, just to play it safe.'

Medical floor directory follows body parts.

'It's going to take me ten hours to read your care instructions and your insurance only covers an hour of care.'

"Is she critical?"

'His insurance company said it does not cover self-inflicted accidents.'

"Actually, what doesn't kill you just raises the cost of everyone's insurance"

'I don't need to go to a gym. One of my classroom management strategies is to circulate frequently around the room. I figure I walk three miles a day.'

Medical mishap.

Unsuitable hospital reading material.

'My husband was recently admitted. Can you direct me to the hypochondria department?'

Boy tricking the nurse

'Always the last place you look.'

CITY HALL DEPARTMENT 230179-B. 'Why, yes, you are in the right office -- Who told you how to get here?'

Injured man sees that he is being taken to the 'No Biggie Room', as opposed to the 'Emergency Room.

'No, I'm not here to see the doctor-just the magazines.'

'I want to change to another doctor, because I've read all of the magazines in your waiting room.'

"Mr. Simpson, a doctor type will see you now."

'-and the look on his face when you overtook him in the Car Wash!'