Hosiery Manufacturer Gifts

Harper, this is the last chance to pull your socks up too.

'Pink isn't EITHER the new black!'

Fake fur coat and no knickers

I love my cape

"Not more sleeve alterations?!"

'Do you have it in black?'

'The brown one that smells like an old man.'

A tailor measuring a large man

Sketches by Boz - Monmouth Street

"We scarf. We bracelet. We earring. We brooch. In brief, ladies, we accessorize."

'Funny, I see images of shoes, wallets and belts...'

"Can't tell one from another with those protective face masks."

GAP. GAP. NO GAP.

"Relax, I'm coming for the suit."

"Would you like your real size or one that artificially inflates your ego?"

Caravan Club shop is selling Hold-Ups.

Men see an old lady in a round hat from the back and think she is a pretty young lady.

"You see, sir? It fits you like a glove!"

Postes Modernes

A tight skirt makes a woman look slim!

The Emporer's Clothes Boutique

"Do you do these in sheep?"

'It's goose down!'

Does this skirt make it look like sexy fat?

''Get a life' was last year! This year it's 'get a while bunch of lives!''

'The Fed said interest rates will stay unchanged...but raising hemlines is a sure sign the economy is moving again.'

Marsupial Mom Jeans,

In The Spring, A Young Man's Thoughts Turn Fancy

"I'm on Fendi and Prada, and heading toward Louis."

'Why couldn't you wear glasses like everyone else?'

"The DVD you want is on my right earlobe."

Checking watch

"The pepperoni, Wilson- get rid of it!"

'I never know whether I should get good gloves that I'll lose after three runs, or cheap gloves that'll fall apart after five runs.'

I've found the designer gene.