Hoop Enthusiast Gifts

'One last test- we need to see how well you jump through a hoop?'

Can't dunk?

"Good game."

The Salmon Run

'The secret to life, my friend, is hoppiness!'

Another reason Chihuahuas hate basketball.

'He's gonna dunk on me. I just know it.'

Why moms make bad refs.

I love Basketball.

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Basketball.

'You sure complain a lot for someone who says he loves nature.'

Puppy.

'Hold on, Pepe!... The score is tied with less than a minute to go - and the losing team gets boiled.'

'This is it, gentlemen. The big game. A date with dentistry.'

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

'I just wish that meant getting ready for the prom instead of the NCAA basketball tournament.'

'Please, Dad? Can we? Can we? Pleeeease?'

'... and finally, before tip-off, let's all be courteous and turn off our cell phones.'

'When you said, Dream Team, I thought you meant the Swiss Bikini Team.'

'In this league, guys, it's all about winning. And we're like, what, 0 and 10? That's why coach got the ax.'

Kobe Bryant

Siegfried and Roy - grand re-opening.

'Billy - no! Do not ask for his autograph. He'll lose his natural fear of fans, become a nuisance, and then he'll need to be tranquilized and relocated to Europe.'

PSYCHIATRIC CLINIC, 'You know what I dread? -- March madness!'

Game In A Can.

'Five seconds! ...Four ...Three ...Two ...One ...SPRING!!'

'Guys! The turnovers are KILLING us!'

Basketball injuries.

'What are the chances? I mean, all 10 players simultaneously dive for a loose ball and conk heads?'

'He's got a good attitude, and he's tall. But he's got to get into the weight room.'

'I hate playing stinkbugs! Every time we press them on defense, they just let 'e rip!'

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'