Homework Excuse Expert Gifts

'We're worried about you. Your teacher called and said you're actually handing in your homework instead of eating it.'

'Did I write that myself? You're not wearing a wire are you?'

'It's worse than that -- my little brother ate my homework.'

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

'I don't know what 'peer pressure' is, but it makes a GREAT excuse!'

"Pfff, eating homework is nothing! My mum eats the clothes off the clothes line..."

'My dog ate my computer.'

My department was abducted by aliens so there is no data between January and April.

'If we can't come up with better ideas, at least we should have better excuses.'

Homework flavored dog food

"My homework is not done because our home modem is tool slow for downloading the answers."

'Homework done only $1.00' 'Homework eaten only $0.50'

'Can I help it if she's a rotten teacher?'

Procrastinator Hall of Fame

"I'm in big trouble. The dog ate my homework, and Dad ate my science project."

"Once again one of your "I'm late because I was abducted and operated on by aliens" excuses?"

'Would you believe, I didn't get my homework done because of PMS?'

"A catfish ate my homework."

"Breakfast will be a little late. Our computer's down."

"He's faking it to get out of school. Bring in his teacher and run some tests."

'Gramma, can you help with my homework?'

"...according to my records Tomkins, this is your grandmother's seventh funeral."

How to deal with weeds

'I don't believe for one minute that an octopus crawled up last night and ate all the coconuts!'

Beware homework eating dog

'I've eaten so much homework that I'm starting to age in paper years.'

'An essay on what I did last summer? -- I was hoping to let all that stuff blow over.'

'I tried to do my term paper, but the video store doesn't have ANYTHING about the Spanish-American War!'

"I did a book report, but then the publisher pulled the book because the author was a plagiarist."

"I figured by not doing my homework I'd lighten your workload by giving you one less paper to correct."

"But....but....isn't that a puff of cloud I see approaching?"

"I never have a good excuse to be late: The teacher knows my dad wakes me up at dawn..."

"I dictated my essay to my parrot. Unfortunately, my cat then ate my homework."

'I'm sorry I didn't practice this week, Mrs. Tinklemeyer. I just had so many distractions!

'What about you, Billy? Did some deranged animal burst in during recess and devour your homework too?'