Homemade Goodness Lover Gifts

"Jim! Long time. Are you still making your own granola?"

'Your French dip, sir.'

"You're the lid to my pot."

'The heart and eyes feel nothing, but the stomach and ears are completely infatuated.'

Heavy man sees 'Comfort Food' aisle

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

"We're odd looking but just as good."

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

'Excuse me - are you organic?'

'Pepperoni: Muse of Pizza'

Victorian Fast Food - 'I'll have the lark pie festooned with eels, a full stilton, two bottles of port,,,'

'I'll give you a bite of my calamari for one of your stuffed shrimp.'

'Just for once, can't we have a picnic without your mates turning up to crawl all over the food?'

"Mom said never use that dirty 4-letter word on vacation...DIET."

"Goodness! These tomatoes look so good!"

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

A man and baby wearing bibs

"Then again, an honest profile picture would not have got me a wonderful 'Duck Confit with a Chocolat Creme Brulee.'"

"There must be a place we can wait on line for an hour before eating."

Things to do while you're stuck at home during the coronavirus crisis.

"I'm trying to gain 10 pounds before midnight so I can keep my resolution to lose 10 pounds next year."

"I only recommend the 24 oz. Prime rib for big fat guys."

'My wife's on a diet. So far she's lost her personality.'

'The marvelous thing about a Singles cruise is, if you don't find an interesting man, you can drown your sorrows with interesting food.'

'You may well have eaten fresher fish before but not in this restaurant. . .'

If traffic signs were used in everyday life...

Cook being told what to do by housemaid

I always forget - is it white with dry food and red with wet food, or the other way around?

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways … Open Mike Night Presents Sadie Cohen. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height my ladle can reach … When feeling hungry for the crunch of crouton and ideal lettuce. I love thee to the level of every day's most quiet need ... by cheesy bread and chicken wing. I love thee freely, as men strive for right. I eat of thee freely, and then, at four, 'tis goodnight. O Sizzler salad bar, how do I love thee? I'm hungry.

'There was sizzle but no steak.'

'You'll love this, it has no nutritional value.'

"Get the meat loaf—I hit it out of the park today."

"George often brings his work home with him."