Home Project Explorer Pillows

'Another DIY enthusiast methinks...'

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

"The smart toaster is down, and it took our wifi, security cameras, and entertainment systems with it."

'Roger's busy making a cat-flap in the kitchen.'

D.I.Y with dad.

'I don't think he's so smart. I had to show him three times before he got the hank of it.'

George was a bit intimidated by his IKEA self-assembly wardrobe.

'I planned to go to work, cancel my appointments, kick back and just relax...then I remembered I'm retired.'

'... And that's where I'm seeking planning permission to build a secret uranium enrichment plant...'

I'm here to update your census form. Since you mailed the form in, have any of your children moved back in with you?

'Good grief! Our house is so 'smart' it just refinanced itself!'

"Shall I kiss it better?"

Clear construction agreements are important.

Ceiling Paint

Homes for sale - some assembly required.

Nano technology.

"Right - that's my laptop, my laptop charger...my kindle, my kindle charger....my iphone, my iphone charger...my ipad, my ipad charger...all my spare batteries and spare chargers...hmmm, I don't seem to have any room for my clothes..."

"I didn't waste lockdown. I did my own facelift."

Bob's DIY Store

'I'm sorry your love seat project failed but at least it makes a romantic fire.'

'Before you say it's got some old parts, remember that you installed it.'

"Frank?"

Cordless Drill and Drill Less Cords.

Location, Location, Location - Next 3 exits.

"For the record. This is usually the exact moment during one of your projects when things go horribly wrong."

'Oh yes, Leonard's a fixit-it man. Only problem is, who'll fix it after him?'

Quick dry paint.

'Pardon the dust. We're remodeling.'

"Do you ever get off that branch?"

"Now he decides to start work on the crazy paving."

I've found it! It was in the bread box! You've found the lost cellphone! SMASH! CRASH BOP! SMASH! Today's feature is offered as a catharsis for anyone who has ever lost a cellphone and been forced to listen to its low-battery beep from some undiscovered place. SMASH. Final beep (Death).

"No, it's not and earthquake. When our smart home goes into sleep mode, it tends to snore."

"If only Donald Trump knew of your wall-building skills!"

Lady to man about big hole in wall: 'Show some gumption. Are you a man ... or are you a mouse?!'

'We have your recliner. Don't call the cops. We'll be in touch!'