Home Project Enthusiasts Pillows

"When he said he was using the lockdown as an opportunity to make something I thought he meant a coffee table."

'The plumber said he can't come right now, but promised to put us on his 'wading list'. Cute, huh?'

"I didn't spark joy."

'How do you like my new, deep plush carpet?'

'We've knocked out the interior walls to improve our home Wi-Fi coverage.'

'You've reached McWit Quality Construction. If your foundation has cracked, press 1, if your plumbing is leaking press 2, if your house is collapsing, press 3 ...'

Hardware Store Tools Wrench

A DIY disaster.

"I'm bored - let's buy a house in the country that has lots of problems."

"The white flag means he gives up and will finally hire a professional to finish the renovation."

Your Home Remodel Team

"Do you prefer the tile engineered to look like wood, or the wood engineered to look like tile?"

"It's a miracle I was able to build this desk all by myself. I'm not so handy."

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's pimping the wall!'

'Have you got one of those things you use to knock nails in...?'

'I figure that if I sell just one, I can retire.'

Wallpapering with Nails

"When we remodeled, we decided to go with the granite countertop."

"The blow drier is broken."

"Was it a fuse?"

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

'Old mother hubbard -- your cupboard is now bare.'

"It's not so much a fixer upper as a tear it downer."

"Okay, I fixed the leaking roof, and I moved the couch over to the far wall, but I'm sorry, I don't unblock toilets!"

"I thought you were out front telling the fence company how to do their job."

Handyman Christmas tree with Tools.

'We're waiting for an estimate that doesn't make him do that.'

Estate Agent - This house that's 'just what we are looking for' is ours

Man falls through ceiling - 'Did you find the leak?'

"They've got insulation to die for!"

"Can't we just get some load-bearing wallpaper?"

'Would it have killed you to go with a store-bought model?'

"Pity that 'on' button's a bit of a stretch."

House Painter gets stuck to the ceiling.

Living together, couple in love.