Home Maintenance Hero Pillows

'Well, I got that nasty stain out of the carpet!'

'The meaning of communinication is the response we get'

I hurt my back and then a pipe broke flooding my house

'Why should I look forward to the weekend? Rake leaves, clean out the gutters, mend the fence, wash the car...'

'I'd recommend the 9 tine.'

Man sweating profusely while shoveling snow in his boxer shorts

'Pull the cord! The vacuum works now!'

"Ma'am, you don't have an ant problem. They're coffee grounds."

'The bad news is that you've got damp rot. The good news is - it's drowning your woodworm.'

Jack of all trades

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

'Harold, when was the last time you cleaned the pool?!'

'These elves sure are helpful around the house.'

Man using to much bug spray

"In the whole length and breadth of this world there is no more admirable a spot for a man and his dog to pass the time than the local Home Depot."

Yardless: Please help

'I found the termites!'

'Can we afford you to save us money by repairing the car yourself...?'

I did it my way.

'White smoke means she decided what to cook. Black smoke means it's done.'

Mulching Vacuum Cleaner

"It's just temporary, until I fix the air conditioner."

'I found the home maintenance manual in the attic. I think it's got mildew.'

'I just finished the floors, so they better stay clean!'

"So, how's the money pit in the kitchen coming?"

"I was ironing the curtains and fell out of the window..!"

"The trees are laughing at us."

Ernie likes to fix things around the house. Just today he's fixed two sandwiches, three sundaes, and some microwave brownies.

"Next time don't use a herbed vinegar."

Dummies Books.

Moses unblocking the toilet.

The household cavalry

'I'm so excited to be remodeling the bathroom'

"Dang, there goes another piece of the wife's good china. You see father, it's

"Sure, it's a break you can live with... but screw one more socket and you're toast!"