Home Maintenance Fanatic T-Shirts

'That was quite a storm we had last night!'

'Harold, when was the last time you cleaned the pool?!'

Yardless: Please help

"In the whole length and breadth of this world there is no more admirable a spot for a man and his dog to pass the time than the local Home Depot."

Man using to much bug spray

Mulching Vacuum Cleaner

'White smoke means she decided what to cook. Black smoke means it's done.'

'I found the home maintenance manual in the attic. I think it's got mildew.'

'I just finished the floors, so they better stay clean!'

"The trees are laughing at us."

The household cavalry

Timber preservation

"Sure, it's a break you can live with... but screw one more socket and you're toast!"

"Ma'am, you don't have an ant problem. They're coffee grounds."

"I fixed your leaky tap and the oven door... but there's nothing I can do with that dodgy seal on the fridge!"

'I'd recommend the 9 tine.'

House proud woman vacuums hair from dog.

'Hanging around the house, Fred, just in case.'

"What already?! You're the one who told me I needed professional help."

"Let me call you back, Lori. I'm binge-watching John clean the gutters."

"I just got a text message from our dehumidifier. It says it doesn't know how much more of this rain it can take."

"Was it a fuse?"

"Why do I feel like your mother is going to blame this on my cleaning?"

Mr. Briggs' Pleasures of Housekeeping, part 1

"The blow drier is broken."

Man falls through ceiling - 'Did you find the leak?'

'Would it have killed you to go with a store-bought model?'

"Whoa - You're gonna need a whole new string!"

Product Testing Department

"The mold cleaners are here! I gotta scram."

'I think my husband's DIYed and gone to heaven.'

"To heck with a husband... just help me find a dependable electrician."

"Someone posted a picture of you working in the yard, so I knew right away it had to be a deepfake."

'Hey, I just mopped the yard.'