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'You're blocking up the electricity!'

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"Evidence suggests she was working on the puzzle, got up to make tea, husband enters and puts last piece in..."

'Darling - I think it's time to stop feeding the birds.'

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

"See that stain? My wife did that, not me. All her, totally her fault."

"Were we expecting a baby?"

"I feel like tearing of all your clothes and putting them in the washing machine."

Yard Sale

"Mulch madness"

"So kids, you got work from your teachers right?"

'... And your wife says; don't bother looking for the key to the drinks cabinet, because she's hidden it where you'll never find it.'

'Oh, Olivia, I just love your new caption! Where on earth did you find it?'

'Say, Hon. . . the pizza's burning.'

'He'll do the dishes now that I've attached an accelerator.'

'Beware you don't trip over him!'

"The blow drier is broken."

'How many times do I have to tell you about putting the toilet seat back up?'

Search for Missing Socks

'It isn't supposed to taste good. It's furniture polish.'

'Maybe putting 'Sleep 20 Hours A Day' first on the list wasn't such a good idea.'

'Harold, I told you not to eat the last piece of pie!'

'Certainly you may come in for a drink. You live here.'

Carpet Cows

'She let the bedbugs bite.'

'Classic literature for D.I.Y. haters'

"Good grief, Bradbury! How long have you been working at home?"

Need something from the fridge? This looks like a job for...Indoorman!

VARIOUS ITEMS OF LABELLED KITCHENWARE.

Hi love...one less for tea tonight

'George, I can't sleep with a window shade flapping! Get up and fix it!'