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'Darling, wake up, I've just realised ... we're not HD ready.'

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

Showbiz Awards

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

"I finally found a use for that old home repair book..."

"I've no idea. Maybe it's the slumber channel."

"Would you sit and watch a 12 hour movie?"

"Thanks! Carl put his heart and soul into it, along with, of course, lots of mud and a boatload of his own saliva."

"Well, the remote's not dowmn the back of the couch."

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

'There's nothing on.'

'Someday TVs will be in big boxes on the floor.'

"It's a new countertop draft system for craft beer!"

"The TV remote? So, I decide what we watch tonight?"

Proud of herself for "never owning a tv" Emily watches eight episodes of a mediocre tv show on her laptop while in bed.

"Again, are you sure I didn't mention about bringing your own 3-D glasses?"

'Sure you won 'Contractor of the Decade' five times, McWit, but what have you done lately?'

'You're using 14' nails on a 2' door? This is definitely a case where bigger is not better.'

"Good news! She's asking for her Banana Republic and Williams-Sonoma catalogues."

"Maybe the termite problem should take precedence over the chimney problem."

Succession 2

Cat gets a hole in one

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

Homo Zapiens

"WOW...this 50.1 theatre sound system makes you feel you're actually in the movie!"

"I'm you from the future! Or the past. I've completely lost track of time."

'If it's a universal remote, how come it doesn't work on the refrigerator?'

'If I thought for one moment that you were identifying...!'

How the goat got square eyes.

"If I had known how adult her place was I would have brought nicer beer."

'I found out how to redecorate the easy way - just call the old wallpaper names and it will come down to slap you!'

'Too bad we're not pay-per-view.'

"It's a lot of work, but we've decided to renovate this old factory."