Home Comfort Strategist T-Shirts

"Next on Winterwatch, we check in on Mr and Mrs Henderson who are hibernating to avoid putting the heating on."

"Now, I'm ready for summer."

"He's got no clue how easy he has it compared to his ancestors."

The Not-So Smart Meter

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."

Unicorn Working From Home

“Can I have her now? Hey! My turn.”

Contented man and cat sleeping

'Wait! That's not one of your novelty slippers...that's the cat!'

"You're never home."

"He's an indoor cat."

"Did you get my e-mail about who takes out the trash today?"

'This was designed for people who have mastered easy chairs and want to attempt something more difficult.'

'A bed just isn't the same without a person in it.'

"It's a beautiful day. I should go for a walk. . . Oh, now my neighbors are all out there."

"Why on earth do you insist on coming to this miserable, isolated, rocky, small island every year to roost? It's covered in guano! Disgusting..."

"According to my phone, society is on the brink of collapse, but, according to our living room, things seem pretty O.K."

Pre-Winter Ennui-'Hon, did you have the furnace checked?'

"I was just telling a fellow today what a good rabbit dog you are."

"Honey! He's breached the recliner! I repeat, the puppy has breached my La-Z-Boy!!"

Working from Home.

'The economy today got a boost from Alan Greenspan, who said it's O.K. to be irrationally exuberant.'

'Senior Cat Warranty, Low maintenance sofa accessory, Unlimited purring and cuddling, Mellow 'been there done that' attitude.'

"The sellers had a lot of kids, so they got tired of running out of hot water. So they upgraded."

"I see a couch."

Blowing up the camping mattress.

"I'm basically a simple dog. Just give me a place to lay my head and lift my leg."

'Now I know why they called this airco model 'Marilyn Monroe'.'

"The point of going outside is the feeling when coming back inside."

"There really is such a thing as having too many pillows."

E-Z Livin'

'You'll have more luck getting the sword out of the stone than getting the remote control out of his hand.'

"The toaster is sueing the sandwich maker over custody of the bread..."

Watching telly

"Central heat. Pretty posh."