Home Buyers Gifts

"Did I mention the view?"

Ugh! Professional Beggars

Mortgages up 'Where?'

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

'And this is Eddy, he's been giving virtual tours long before computers.'

Do you like to talk about Real Estate? Like to meet other men and women who do? Dial the... REAL-ESTATE HOTLINE

"Talk about energy efficient...every lightbulb in this house will outlive you!"

'Can we call a realtor now?!'

Estate Agent showing client his parents' house - '...and here's one from our affordable homes range'

'Oh look, the tide is coming in.'

"This condo includes free access to fitness facilities...7 flights of stairs."

"A little baking soda will get rid of the smell.

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

Estate Agent - This house that's 'just what we are looking for' is ours

'Honey, I'm home.'

Jet flies by. 'And of course it's handy for the airport.'

'I see a carefree lifestyle by a quiet lake. No, wait, my mistake - looks like I called up the real estate section.'

'The owners are a bunch of clowns.'

'What makes you think the basement leaks?'

'The only means of access was via the previous tenant's hair. But not to worry, there's a ladder 'round the back.'

House hunting is cruel.

'They're playing house.'

'Hey! By appointment only!!'

'A great location and only one step from the beach.'

'This is close enough.'

'New in town, hey? Let me show you a great condo tower.'

'Ok, we've rented the whole building ... oops, they just put on another floor.'

'Ready?!'

'It looked a lot bigger in the photos.'

"Wow . . . We could really fill this room with uncomfortable silences."

'How much?! You can't be serious: It's a hole in a tree!'