Home Brew Hopeful Gifts

'Would you like some of our house wine? I just made it.'

A Good Batch.

Mount Olympus Brewery. Those might be dangerous to open. They're Pandora's Bocks.

'So, what do you think of my first attempt at making homemade beer?'

You got that beer that the monks make, didn't you?

"Buy a man a six-pack, he drinks for a day. Teach him to brew, he drinks all his life."

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

You've Had Enough!

"It's a new countertop draft system for craft beer!"

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

"Try this new IPA I just finished. Let me know if the malts and hops are layered like last week's batch." "Bailey was a really 'good boy'."

"The instructions for the beer-making kit you gave me? Didn't need them -- I figured it out for myself. Drink up."

'According to this, she began making wine in her laundry room 30 years ago, and now she's moved on to the garage.'

"This cheap can of domestic beer has a bouquet reminiscent of...beer."

Micro-Brewed Brain Beer

"Tea parties are passé. I'm opening a craft brewery."

My dad makes his own beer.

'I brew it myself.'

'Doesn't seem right somehow-REAL ale in PLASTIC glasses!'

'I should never have let you pick the taps!'

'There are shortcuts to making home brew, but taking a swig of malt extract and letting it ferment in your mouth isn't one of them.'

Serving wine - "I make it myself."

'Potatoes. How many would I need to make a bottle of vodka?'

"Barry made the wine. I made the cheese."

"Oh yes,decidedly hoppy."

'But our secret ingredient is large quantities of Hilberg beer.'

"We had no sherry so I left him some of your dad's home brew instead."

"We grind our own catnip."

'Why bother recreating the 5,000-year-old recipe fo the ancient Egyptians, when there's already one that old at the back of the fridge?'

Now that, my friend, is a beer garden!

"Not moonshine - small batch, artisanal grain alcohol."

'To save money, Bob started making his own wine. This Chablis, for example, only cost him $329 a bottle.'

'I'm kind of a survivalist myself. I roast my own coffee and distil my own gin.'

'And here's a year's supply of Jim's Pinot Noir. When you taste it, you'll know why it's a year's supply.'

"The sourdough starter says it still believes Covid was a hoax."