Home Aesthetics Enthusiast Gifts

'I know you're proud of your success but couldn't you have invested in something more attractive?'

"Ironically, this is the living room."

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

"Make yourself comfortable on my new decorative throw rocks."

"I may not know much about art, but I do know what's suitable for framing."

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

Decorated officer - 'And these are for keeping my pants up.'

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

"You're welcome."

Cat statues on entrance gate

"I said to myself, 'Maybe I can't change the world, but I can remodel my bathroom.' "

I'm beginning to regret buying that Roomba.

'We want it painted the colour of money!'

'I can't move in, Ted - your lifestyle is too modern. And your furniture is way too modern.'

Woman has 3 towels in her restroom: 'Mine', 'Mine' and 'Mine'.

'I'm not sure which I like best - the fake fire or the fake man with brandy glass in front of it.'

"On second thought, mabe it would look better over there."

"We needed to replace our kitchen floor and it kind of grew from there."

"Except for that wall socket, the whole damn thing is a trompe-l'oeil."

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

'You had to put a skylight in didn't you?'

'Welcome to the house warming! The map points out what is furniture and what is sculpture.'

Posh Easter Egg

"Hedge-fund managers have to have something over their sofas, too."

'For our next party, let's invite a carpenter, a painter and an upholsterer so they can help us clean up afterward.'

"Hon, do you think the accent wall was a mistake?"

'So, how much to remove this ugly old tree? $1750. It's not THAT ugly.'

'Ooh, hey...real hardwood floors!'

"We want it to look lived in, but not necessarily by us."

"You like it? It’s from the MoMA Store!"

"My incentive for losing weight? I bought a fitted sheet a size to small."

"Dave, we need to talk about office props and work productivity."