Holy Flapper Fan T-Shirts

'It's not for myself, you understand."

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

"I just know he's gonna ask me why I voted for Trump."

Swing dancers.

"Would you like to leave a message? He's on the throne"

"I said, 'I'm not on duty! I just came back to get my flip-flops.'"

Vista Acres - A tanned community.

'Go right on in, Helen. By the way, be sure to read tomorrow's newspaper - I understand your grandson has drawn a cartoon in your honor.'

"Can you write 'To Mandy - you're the best'?"

"This oughtta be good...my lawyer is about to read my Will. I left everything to my cat Binky!"

Man crushing grapes with flippers.

"Closed until further notice."

'Hold on to this ticket. Immediately after armageddon, there'll be a drawing for door prizes!'

"But you're paper trained and we don't have any newspapers or newspaper people."

"Do they make my feet look big?"

Charleston dance.

"Okay, okay - I'll keep my day job!"

"Ugh, it rings every time an angel gets his wings - how do I put it in silent mode?"

Ginger was born to dance.

Football Angel

"OK people, this one's for the blooper reel, so let's blow it out there."

Why it takes longer for lawyers to get in: 'This would go a lot faster if you'd stop saying, 'alleged'...'

'You've all been whining a lot lately, so this week's sermon is from the 'Book of Lamentations'....'

A leap of faith.

"That's one thing you can't get up here, a good hot curry."

Angel Basketball