Holistic Wellness Lover T-Shirts

"Gym for regular people" "No intimidating trainers!" "Lo-tech" "Less is more!" "Not plastic" "Fluffy and scented" "No mirrors" "Full service restaurant"

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

'You've got, like, a Feng Shui problem with your pancreas, dude.'

Proceed no further if chakras not aligned.

'Doctor, how much acupuncture experience DO you have?'

'As soon as I get a small tattoo, I'm going to take up yoga.'

"Looks like your Yang is on the move again."

'Follow this diet, and soon the temple of your soul will just be a small chapel.'

If all else falls...Mom's Chicken Soup

"Things look good but let's run a few more tests since mortality runs in your family."

'Who would have thought there was a market for it? We're going to be rich George!...'

Diet Books: Fiction/Non-Fiction

Alternative Medicine.

Extreme Naturopathic Medicine.

'Please bow your head and cough. I need to check your hairballs.'

Man to other coming out of Alternative Health Club: 'I had total joint replacement - they switched me from hemp to medical marijuana.'

Acupuncture clinic

'Some of you may have heard that Dr. Weil is giving HIS talk right now in the next auditorium.'

'Learn to relax and don't bottle yourself up.'

"Holy moly!"

The Farmer Sutra.

Doctor with Teddy - "Take this. It will help you sleep."

'It's anxiety. Don't worry, vitamin B happy.'

"Cardiac day patients?"

"Good for you for getting your mammogram."

'It says, 'If you want more fiber, eat the package.'

'What kind of quack is he? No pills, no special diets! He just believes in will power!'

'Of course he's an actor. When was the last time you saw a kid enjoy something that was good for him?'

"When I say I'm rich I don't just mean in Omega 3 oils."

'You're perfectly fit and healthy...but at your age...seriously, what's the point?'

'But boss, this will keep my muscles from getting fatiqued.'

'Rent two 'feel good' movies, and call me in the morning.'

"He went to an alternative therapy seminar to find ways of reducing his stress levels..."

Connect This, Woo-Woos

"It's all down to turmeric!"