Holiday Weight Keeper T-Shirts

'And in the red corner, still carrying a little Christmas weight...'

"Do you remember, Peg—are we on our way out or on our way back?"

"I prefer to talk to Mrs. Claus. She doesn't care if I'm naughty or nice."

'It's a blonde, long-legged species with a melodious voice and it goes south for the winter.'

Camping-Pong

'See you in two weeks!'

Skier and his dog.

'Research shows that while the number of surfers is somewhat constant over the year, there is a sudden increase in casual bathers over Summer...'

'Santa is the delivery man, I'm the CEO. Do you know what a CEO is, Lisa?'

'I prefer to do absolutely nothing on holiday....otherwise the shock's too much when I get back.'

"Will she know what this is in reference to?"

"Cut down on the Ho-Ho's."

Thru The Eyes Of A Lifeguard.

A pilgrim driving a camper leaving the Mayflower ship.

The night of the return

"I manage to avoid jetlag by just catching an earlier flight..."

"Pick two! Staying abreast of the rapidly evolving global pandemic and what it means for your middle-class suburban life. Creating holiday memories that your kids will treasure throughout their lifetimes. Remembering to eat a vegetable."

Boxing Day

Nutcracker

"I'm only gone one night a year and you still watched our show without me?"

'Let's face it, every day is Christmas Day for us!'

"Well, come to think of it, we are creatures of habit: Always migrating to the same place and stopping at the same spots on the way..."

"My husband has such a good memory: He's never missed a birthday or a wedding anniversary..."

I'm trying to keep the Christmas spirit all year.

Scrooge: only-23-days until day after Christmas.

"At this time of the summer, I hate time."

"He claims he had no idea this was a much-loved animal."

'Sports teams play year round, so we decided to do the same for Christmas.'

"Harold, I think your obsession about your weight is getting out of hand!"

Boxer

'I watch this Christmas cartoon every year and I still don't get why the dog eats a gigantic pile of human femur bones.'

'That's what I like, a good old fashioned Christmas.' (sign in window reads 'Out now - Do They Know It's Christmas!')