Holiday Tricks Pillows

Revenge on Santa

'Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who're in fact naughty.'

'Looks like someone beat us to the punch.'

"I ask that today is a good day...a day that brings family together...to show how we need one another."

"Why would I want to meet Santa? I can just go home and log onto his social media page from the comfort of my bed."

'Dang, again we're going so fast that we caused a disruption in the time-space continuum.'

It's beginning to smell a lot like Christmas

'Looks like no Christmas bonus this year.'

"Did you check the little patch of grass by the swing set?"

'I hope you all like stuffing.'

Clown Skis.

"When it comes to turkeys, Mom, you sure know your stuff-ing."

"The last one is Uncle Charlie. He was pardoned in 1987."

Santa's wash day.

"I hear you helped make the stuffing. I like raisins."

"I noticed a few browns."

'I'm dreaming of a green Christmas, with every recycled Christmas card I write...'

"I like it here but if Santa doesn't get better WiFi I'm getting a new job."

Death Photobombs a Holiday

"So yes, I bit him! How was I supposed to know it was Master wearing a red fat-suit and a fake white beard?"

The other days of the year...

"It's my family's special recipe, passed down through generations on the cream cheese package."

Kid Hints To Santa That He Wants A Bicycle For Christmas

Merry Kissmas

"We're history, Rudolph....I tell ya, we're history."

'HO,HO,HO,WHY ARE YOU AFRAID OF SANTA CLAUS??!!'

'After you ask him for the pony, ask him to pay for your college education.'

Merry Sisyphus - Christmas pudding being pushed up a mountain.

'Happens every year - I can never remember where I put the tree decorations.'