History Buffs Seeking A Laugh Pillows

"Hello. You have reached the Palace. If you wish to speak to the King, press '1' now. If you wish to speak to the Queen, press '2' now. If you wish to speak to the Chancellor of the Exchequer, press '3' now. And if you wish to speak to the Minister of Cul

"Can you stop complaining about historical inaccuracy and try to enjoy yourself for one minute?"

"Skate or die."

"I should cover your ears.I'm not very good at this.'

Caveman sees comment section below cave drawings,

"If Noah asks... Just tell him you've all had your vaccinations."

'You've had a bad day? Try being stuck in this house!'

"Let's try one with your hand tucked into your shirt."

Alien Mount Rushmore

"Go on. Throw the stick."

'What's this, lad? Didn't I tell you not to carry anything heavy!'

Mummy reading a book in his sarcophagus.

'We're going to wander in the desert for forty years? What about portability of benefits?'

Billards.

Noah's Dinghy

'Not tonight, dear. I've got a headache.'

Searching for a Wife

'George, I'd like you to meet Mademoiselle Fifi LaTour from Paris -- she inspired me to invent bifocals!'

"Take this, Luke. They say it's impossible to get a decent baguette west of the Pecos."

"It's closing time and four people are unaccounted for. Start looking."

BRINGGGG!, 'I TOLD you to turn off your cell phone!'

Queen Victoria having a barbecue using BBQ sauce

I think in order to be historically accurate you're meant to remove the quill from the bird BEFORE you start trying to write with it!

"Honest Abe, huh? Your tax returns tell a different story."

'This can't be Pearl Harbor... Let me see that chart!'

"Yeah, yeah. Everybody's got palms and opposable thumbs and the ass only has hooves... Get over yourselves, people!"

"Okay, so you're an angel. Now what?"

'The hook was too dangerous.'

'The manna is okay, but why don't we get our choice of toppings?'

Loterie Francaise...

"This year's all about fur on the inside."

'We're modern day pirates, but we don't look like modern day pirates.'

"He just discovered his reflection."

'I cause anxiety? But I have anxiety.'

Uses of a Dead Cat: Anti-aircraft Defences.