Hipster Monk Pillows

Punk monk.

"Our Summer Citrus IPA contains your full daily requirement of fruit and fiber."

"Don't shave it. It gives your face character."

"I'll have the drum an sea bass, the house salad and the techno nachos!"

"I'll have a cup of coffee, and would you mind removing that ridiculous painting and turning off the Wilco?"

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

"Come to our microbrew party Saturday. It's B.Y.O.B. — Bring Your Own Brewery."

"And the meaning of life is.... oh rats, the battery died."

"It's ok -- It's the Enlightenment Channel."

"I'm going on a retreat."

"You'll find that as a restaurateur I've worked hard to showcase the finest in organic and free range ingredients that have been harvested and prepared in authentic and traditional ways."

"If we could all turn to page 387, turn off your iPods and repeat after me?"

"They always fall for the old 'high-impact yoga' trick!"

"Thousands of craft beers and I still haven't found one with a smooth, kibble finish."

Running shoes? You have the wrong idea about "fasting," Brother Ernest!

"Many of us are worrying, Brother Daniel, that you've become too clothes conscious."

"Yo, how's it swinging?"

'No, Father, they're not praying. They're texting.'

"No this is timeless classic menswear appreciation. Hipster beatnik is Tuesday nights."

"I love blue Martinis. It's like the fifties and the nineties all mixed up together."

What your guitar says about you.

'I invited God to be one of my friends on Facebook and he's turned me down!'

The Inventor of the Man Bun.

"Mind if we go through the Park? There's this ailing ginkgo tree I want to check on."

"O.K., God – please delete everything I said today."

Homing Beatnik

The most popular Sunday at St Clive's was always the annual 'Blessing of the Smartphones' service.

Computer literate Monk

Gracebook.

Designer Republic of Shoreditch

Pray as you Go.

Gentrification of the Fridge.

Stormtrooper takes off the helmet.

'Today's sermon is from St. Matthew, Chapter Five....'