Hilarity Seeker Gifts

'But Mum, I don't want to go inside to hibernate: I'm not even tired...'

"Police. Nobody move or groove."

The 1st annual pet baptism was also the last

"And when the canyon fills up, that's it; herd immunity."

Mike (The Situation) is rumored to have written the original manuscript for his best-selling memoir entirely out of bronzer.

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

...and then I...wait....What's that?? Whoa! We're on a spaceship! This is fun! Hey! What's this button do? Can I pull this lever? Are we there yet? Take a selfie with us? Do we get snacks? Can I drive? Are we there yet? Something we said? Just imagine if we'd been obnoxious!

12 O'clock was 'I'm a tractor time.'

Invasion Of The Summer Aliens

Due to his low center of gravity, Jake is the greatesr broncbuster ever!

'The circle is complete!'

'Fetch.'

ACME INDUSTRIES NEW PRODUCTS DIVISION, 'The best part is, it can repossess itself!'

'Hold on just a few more minutes. I want mine medium well.'

Sounds that various toys make when they are vacuumed up.

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

A sheep dog has stacked the sheep four high - 'He used to be with the circus before he came to the farm...!'

Transylvanian backpackers.

'Been Away?' A piece of bread looks at a piece of brown toast as if it's got a suntan.

King Kong uses fly spray against the pesky planes on top of the Empire State Building

The Runaway Horse

Giraffe Umbrella

Mom! Don't call me abominadorable in front of my friends!

"Remember that time you tried to kill me?"

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

Figures from 'Ascent of Man' diagram all do the Conga: 'Let's all fo the Conga, na-na-na-na ...'

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

"Well how about that. . . Lady Godiva bought a Harley!"

A caveman paints from life

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

"Four years of dental school only to tell all my patients 'Don't worry about any tooth issues - they'll just fall out and be replaced, anyway'."

"I'm just here to pick up some bagels."

National Everything Awareness Day

'Looks like someone beat us to the punch.'