High Roller Strategist T-Shirts

"The dealer will allow me to return the limo if my investments go bad."

'Okay...3.5 billion in stock, 2.5 billion in cash, 80 million in deferred compensation, my own private jet, a luxury car lease for the next ten years, 3 club memberships and...

'Tomorrow's special is fish, so wear the flounder suit.'

'You should have taken up the game earlier.'

"I need to increase my salary so I can increase my spending."

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

'What do you mean - you 'LET him win'?'

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

"My favorite tea: hot daffodil-infused chamomile with a hint of whiskey. Are you serious? Of course I'm serious! I've been dosing myself with small quantities of poisonous daffodil ever since 1931. You have to build up an immunity if you want to survive in the cutthroat world of Scrabble tournaments."

'In the 20 minutes it took for the pit boss to come back with a comp for the $10 buffet, I lost another $500.'

"My mommy suggested I try a different advertising approach."

"And when conventional theories don't work, we've got Charnier here to do us a spot of voodoo marketing."

Destination casinos...

Snail Coach

"Four hours study and the poor love still can't decide which luxury saloon to buy for himself."

"Saturn. No contest. A deadly, treacherous gas giant ringed by a gossamer halo of ice. It symbolizes both death and life. Both evil and good. It symbolizes existence itself."

Businessman at the deep end.

". . . and that dumb Mrs. Parker could have figured I had the Ace, King and Jack, but no, she goes ahead bidding in hearts. . ."

"I was hoping to make billions, but I've settled for making millions."

'Frank said if he ever won a lot of money from online gambling, he wouldn't change, He lied,'

'We ride the storm until greed is back.'

"The answer isn't more troops—what you need is an antibiotic."

'I'm all in.'

'The reason I'm paid fifty times more is because I think I'm worth it.'

'I'll see your dirty laundry, and raise you six children.'

You Are Now Entering Las Vegas. Lock Your Car And Open Your Wallet

'Governor game change and his replacement debate moderators...'

"I'm in advertising. . ."

'You really have no idea what you're doing do you?'

"Timing is everything. I recommend that you act now before the authorities discover I've escaped."

'After all these years of purposely losing to the boss, I beat the pulp out of him and turned in my resignation.'

"I'd fire him in a minute, but the old man thinks we need his unique perspective around here."