High-fiver Pillows

'Anderson! On this team we slap hands or slap fannies after someone scores a run. We do not slap faces.'

'The good thing about the outside is that it's always open!'

Pilot with champagne.

"Let's face it. The only play you've ever liked is 'Stop the World - I Want to Get Off.'"

Flight attendant piloting Santa's sleigh.

"A naked dress is perfect when you have nothing to wear."

Private Jet

All it takes is a little willpower and a good metabolism...

"If you're wondering why you've been chosen 'Employee of the week,' it's because your work load is about to increase, while your pay remains the same."

"We are now boarding priority travellers. Please be ready to present an air of entitlement."

High Jump

Missing you.

'When are you going to give up this 9 to 5 nonsense and become a rock star like your brother?'

'Could you throw me the car keys?'

'Ah, Reeves - it's lonely on top!'

"And getting rarer by the day, madam!"

Base jumper being filmed about to jump off a building.

The Mortons: It's all about our money.

'Wow! That's got to be some sort of record!'

'Well, I'm glad you two share a sense of humor.'

"I just attained enlightenment! - Gimme a high-five!"

'The stock market closed early today due to an outbreak of 'altitude sickness'.'

The Hot Air Sports Club AGM

'I tried to teach him to shake, but he'd rather do 'high fives'.'

'You don't know why you're down here?... Aren't you the guy that invented the high five in sports?'

"We'll begin boarding our first-class passengers after a ten-minute pause in honor of the even wealthier people who fly in private jets."

'Shall I box up the shoes, or does your son want to fly them home?'

'Come on! You only live once!'

Skydive

"Thanks for calling the celebration help desk. For assistance with high fives, press one now. For fist bumps, press two, for chest bumps, press three..."

'EEEEHA!'

'Hi, I'm a sky marshall, you?'

Flying carpets.

"O.K., Mr. Spinelli, you're up. Now bank her to the right, and I'll talk you back in for a nice smooth landing."

The only thing I have to offer is my own confusion."