Heroic Firefighter Gifts

Why Do You Want to Be When You Grow up?

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

"Foster failure"

"No Frodo, we are still many leagues from Mordor. This is from a wildfire by I-5 west of Bakersfield."

'Yes, as a matter of fact, you have caught me at a bad time.'

"Smokey The Tree"

Woman escapes with cats.

"Never mind how I got up here....just call the fire department."

'It was the little darling's first time sitting up at the dining table!'

'I said 'Shall I put the cat out?''

'Strong curry for two and a fire-extinguisher.'

The New Normal

'In case of fire, don't panic, pay your bill then run like hell.'

"Oh we're fine, my husbands just learning to cook during the quarantine."

"I came as soon as I got the message!"

'It's good to see that you have a smoke detector...'

'Waiter, could I have some more water right away?'

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

Lifesaver!

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

'I'm filling in for the sommelier. We have a fine shiraz today for only $39. It's 14.7 alcohol, a Class 1B flammable, so if I see you consume it near an open flame, I'll have to cite you.'

"Wow, these e-readers take forever to burn..."

"The third leading cause of forest fires."

"It would be great if you could turn the smoke machine down a little during worship..."

Buddy hadn't learned from the time his tongue got stuck.

"These are the environmentalists who set the Amazon forest on fire!"

A fire extinguisher box with band aids in them has a sign above with reads, "In case you cut yourself breaking glass break this glass."

Professor Algarth Zag, pioneer in fire research.

Fire hydrant with regular or sparkling water

'If I don't use the charcoal grill, I get a carbon offset and the fire department gets a day off.'

Fire door.

Firefigher arm-wrestling with a dragon.

'MEN! We've got a fire at the cattle shed! Do we want rare, medium or well done?'

'I've decided I'm going to be a fireman when I grow up.'

"First save Mister chomp-chomp!"