Hermit Aspirants Gifts

"I was social distancing. Until you just showed up."

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

"Yes, I'm alone."

Talent, pluck, or plain dumb luck?

'It's a sign of the times, a high rise block of caves reserved for hermits.'

OM, SWEET OM

'I warned him about thinking the unthinkable!'

Bearded old man atop mountain.

"Yes, I'm the wise man who lives on the top of the mountain. And believe me, the surcharge for the pizza delivery service is insane!"

'Oh wise one - what is the secret to long life?'

"Free why-fi.”

"The meaning of life! Have you tried Googling it?"

'Wow! - Your diary is even more boring than MY diary!'

"You go on ahead. I'm going to hang out here for the next few months until everyone stops saying the word 'caucus.'"

"Do you think solitude drives you insane?"

"So, you're staying in then?"

"Living underground is not what it used to be."

'Oh, he's pretty wise -- I clerked for him.'

Woman meets up with guru: 'Oh, there you are, honey. Dinner's getting cold.'

'Well, in my case, Muzak DOESN'T help with meditation!'

"He's a super-calloused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

Buy one enlightenment get one free.

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

"Why would YOU want to know the meaning of life?"

'Because Elvis is FULL of philosophical insights.'

'It's a good thing everything is illusory - My keister hurts like crazy!'

'Government regulations are simple and explicit - ONE guru to a mountain top!'

Excess Baggage: Forcing your homebody spouse to accompany you on a business trip is generally not a great idea.

'Hey! - Do I have to separate you two?'

"Master, I'm looking for enlightenment!"

"Actually, I just came up here to get away from leading economic indicators."

'One of us will tell you how to achieve peace and harmony just as soon as we settle who called dibs on this ledge.'

'Enlightenment does that to some people.'

"The meaning of life? To be honest, I haven't given it much thought."