Helicopter Parenting Survivor Pillows

"Mum, I'm 38 - I can go on my own now."

'I don't want him experiencing anything until I've totally checked it out.'

"Honey, you're spoiling that child."

'News headline: Britain unsafe to bring up young children.'

"It's childhood. Your child has childhood."

A boy and his spin patrol.

"I don't think my parents have a lot of confidence in me."

"I think he's outgrown the baby gate."

The Mother Of Damocles

'If you fuss over him all the time and make his life too comfortable, he'll never leave!'

"Listen, I'm still your mother."

'How many kids do you actually have?'

"My mom can be a little over-protective ... "

Mother's Whistler.

"Remember - kindergarten is an excellent opportunity to make connections for first grade."

"I'm letting him soak."

'Is it all right if I have a snack out of the refrigerator?'

"GP or chemist? To be on the safe side let's go to A and E."

"My mom won't let me eat snowflakes unless they're certified organic."

"Go, take the afternoon off, I'll babysit: he'll be safe with me..."

"Sometimes I feel the only thing keeping us together is our fear of the children."

"And we're just so proud you're walking to school alone. Aren't we, Harold?"

"Yes, I'm wearing a cowbell. It's just until my mom figures out a way to track me on my phone."

"The babysitter wants to know where you keep your vodka?"

"Please remind your mom and dad that its not a parent-teacher-attorney conference."

No, it does not look stupid, and yes, you are going to wear a helmet.

"What channel is David's summer camp on?"

"And a mild sedative for the kid behind me."

"When they say to use protection... this is what you're protecting against."

"I know your mom is kind of over-protective, but the surveillance drone is freaking me out."

"Robo calls from your mother on lines 1, 3 and 4."

"It's a parental drone my mom uses to keep tabs on me."

"They'll come home. They're microchipped."

'Honey it's time to let go and cut the cord. He's a man now! He's going to college for goodness sake!'

Rodney, It's Your Mother Are You Wearing Sunscreen