Helicopter Parenting Survivor T-Shirts

"Mum, I'm 38 - I can go on my own now."

'I don't want him experiencing anything until I've totally checked it out.'

"Honey, you're spoiling that child."

'News headline: Britain unsafe to bring up young children.'

A boy and his spin patrol.

"It's childhood. Your child has childhood."

"I think he's outgrown the baby gate."

'If you fuss over him all the time and make his life too comfortable, he'll never leave!'

The Mother Of Damocles

"Listen, I'm still your mother."

'How many kids do you actually have?'

"Remember - kindergarten is an excellent opportunity to make connections for first grade."

"My mom can be a little over-protective ... "

"My mom won't let me eat snowflakes unless they're certified organic."

"Go, take the afternoon off, I'll babysit: he'll be safe with me..."

"I'm letting him soak."

'Is it all right if I have a snack out of the refrigerator?'

"GP or chemist? To be on the safe side let's go to A and E."

"Sometimes I feel the only thing keeping us together is our fear of the children."

"Yes, I'm wearing a cowbell. It's just until my mom figures out a way to track me on my phone."

"Please remind your mom and dad that its not a parent-teacher-attorney conference."

"The babysitter wants to know where you keep your vodka?"

"And we're just so proud you're walking to school alone. Aren't we, Harold?"

"What channel is David's summer camp on?"

"I know your mom is kind of over-protective, but the surveillance drone is freaking me out."

"Robo calls from your mother on lines 1, 3 and 4."

"When they say to use protection... this is what you're protecting against."

"They'll come home. They're microchipped."

"And a mild sedative for the kid behind me."

"It's a parental drone my mom uses to keep tabs on me."

Rodney, It's Your Mother Are You Wearing Sunscreen

'Honey it's time to let go and cut the cord. He's a man now! He's going to college for goodness sake!'

"There you go, honey. Have fun."