Heartbreak Handler Pillows

"This is my new country song I wrote about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

"I met him on an online dating site. He was on their 'return' section."

Blues artis's daily list

"We can try and mend the damaged heart, but not a broken one."

'I see. So what you're saying is that you woke up this morning and your woman had done left you.'

"Can you recommend a nice red wine that goes well with a broken heart?"

"We can deal with many heart related issues apart from 'a heart torn asunder by the meretricious behavior of a mendacious lover.'"

"Let's text her, she'd like that."

"Only time can heal a broken heart, Brenda, and fortunately I have the time, every Thursday at three o'clock."

'2 chocolate truffles in the morning and 2 in the evening should cure your broken heart,,,'

"Men just won't leave me alone!"

"And the person who made all those promises, this man you loved, trusted and ran away with, who subsequently stole your life savings and then abandoned you... is he in the courtroom today?"

'If cupid shot me with his arrow this week, it would bounce right off!'

"Oh no! You, again?"

'I see. So what you're saying is that you woke up this morning and your woman had done left you.'

'Another triple, Joe -I'm trying to forget several women.'

Mr. Chester's diplomacy

"I don't love you anymore. Let's just be friends."

"...ummm, remember that guy from Pennsylvania that you dumped?"

The Invention of Country Music.

'Darlin', what's an adjective for a two-timin', heart-breakin' outlaw that rhymes with iPod?'

"I'm sorry your girlfriend left you, Frank...but you must concentrate on the job!"

The Conductor

"They don't call it 'The Boulevard of Broken Dreams' for nothing, kid."

Caution Fragile

'It feels great now, but you will see when it's pulled out.'

"Don't cry over her. There will be plenty of fish out of the sea."

"Recently separated."

Tears

Her tears flowed like wine.

"Come on now. It's not that bad. We never even had Paris."

'We're sorry for your loss. but it must be a consolation to know that his death didn't effect our targets.'