Heart-and-soul Strategist T-Shirts

"Yeah, Bob's an old flame. I had to dig a fire line to keep him at bay."

'I sent out for everything.'

'I've tried all night without potting a ball.' - 'Try taking away the wooden frame.'

"What I’ve learned is you have to look deep inside your heart and ask yourself, ‘What is it that she really wants to hear?’"

"He keeps reissuing everything I take issue with."

"He was furiously reading the Bible before he died." "Looking for loopholes."

A cat is hiding in a block of cheese to lure a mouse out of its hole.

'He's a catch for any woman - there's so much to re-mould'

Colin could see that his competitor had obviously done his market research.

"Why won't you cuddle?"

Planned Parenthood: Not Tonight Dear. I Have a Headache.

"I'm not only a Guardian Angel, I'm also an expert at turnarounds."

"Oh darling! I just got your wonderful value added proposition! Of course I'll marry you!"

"It's a long-term strategy to make them lazy and complacent first."

Dating the efficiency expert.

"Sir, your new campaign manager is here."

"I don't know whether to love you or leave you - but then that's the reality of arbitrage."

'It would never work, Tommy - you have all the growth funds and mine are all value...'

"Game of checkers? Okay, but I'm watching every move you make."

'It was so romantic. He got down on one knee, showed me the ring, and proposed--right after we exchanged credit reports.'

Mergers or acquisitions.

'And that, in a nutshell, is why men don't understand women.'

"Helen, is it possible that we are using our child as an intimacy barrier?"

Single girl in wedding dress trying to catch a bachelor.

'First, you have to stop treating your husband like a child.'

If you are ringing your coach to ask about your next move then we're finished.

Wall St Baptist: 'Life is exactly like the stock market exchange and we each have our own portfolio to manage.'

Marriage counselor, living together counselor or a just screwing around counselor.

Success

"We're making progress."

"But gosh, Ursula, together we'd be exactly what every major advertiser is trying to reach."

"No, I don't think our marriage would benefit from a mission statement."

'Let's take a minute to allow the bad karma of the old regime to lift.'