Healthy Living Aspirant Gifts

The Janopause

"Unexpected item in bagging area."

'I stay trim because of high metabolism. Theirs, not mine.'

Man on exercise bike with dog on treadmill

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

On the back of the t-shirt...

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

'Eat less. Drink less. Be merry more.'

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

'I feel like exercising. Have you seen my tennis shoes?'

The Fast Lane.

'Protein, starch, vegetable??? When you said 'square meal' I thought PIZZA IN A BOX!'

"Another one so relaxed, she couldn't walk out of here."

To do before Saturday...

"I work out in preparation for being out of shape for the next 30 years."

"You can't compare apples and oranges because oranges have longer legs."

"Can Johnny come out and eat?"

'All those vegetables Mom's been feeding me finally paid off. I'm a squash.'

'Nothing impacts my lifestyle choices more than a veterinarian with a scale.'

'Good news. Your cholesterol has stayed the same, but the research findings have changed.'

'The second diet of my diet is always the easiest. By then, I'm off my diet.'

"Yes, also it keeps you fit."

"Pollyanna, your teeth are shot. Stop sugar coating everything!"

"I'm afraid it's not cheese, it's 'cheese-like'."

'You may not feel any healthier right away, but you'll definitely feel more smug.'

"I think globally, but I tend to pollute locally."

"You ordered the organic, unprocessed, whole wheat spaghetti?"

The trim reaper

'Miss Raleigh. I'm studying megatrends. Bring me some megavitamins.'

"I'll get my 10,000 steps in tonight!"

"Moses, some of the people are requesting gluten free manna."

Healthy living has added years to Melvin's life.

'As you're pregnant, I suppose you are eating for two? Or don't you want to cut down that much?'

Spontaneous Kombucha

Woman forcing family to hike through hills.