Healthcare Worker With A Sense Of Humor Pillows

'I told you we should have packed a lunch.'

'Nurse, has the staff been eating in pre-op again? There's mayonnaise on the scalpel.'

'Did I touch a nerve?'

'I've mislaid a scalpel.'

"We got the results back from the post-mortem. It appears he was still alive before we started it."

'Sorry, we don't know as much as we'd like to about warming a stethoscope.'

'Yes, I suppose it's worth a try - after all we have nothing to lose.'

"When the doctor shows up please remember to blink, in case he thinks you're the post-mortem."

"Anyone else for a prostate test?"

"They said it'd take time to expel the air pumped in during the procedure"

'Fortunately, the virus is dormant. Just be careful you don't wake it up.'

"Let's not talk about your diagnosis. It depresses me too much."

"We can't seem to agree... tell us, what do YOU thing is wrong with you?"

"The next patient is complaining of a running nose."

Free clinic with sign in window reading 'the worst things in life are also free'.

"We're keeping you overnight because the nurses love you!"

Happy Birthday to you.

Fly Hospital: "Just a slight stinging then you'll be fast asleep."

'Don't be alarmed - I'm a proctologist.'

Just Browsing.

'Maintenance to the O.R....Maintenance to the O.R....'

An aspiring magician as well as a top notch surgeon, Dr.Curmbott always tried the old tablecloth trick after each operation.'

"Your appointment's been cancelled. You took too long filling out those forms."

Transplant delivery

"Old Mrs. Cranshaw is next, Doctor. Better put on your white jacket."

Nurse cautioning a patient

'The plastic funnel will keep him from biting his stitches.'

Plastic Surgery

'He still doesn't know how serious an amputation he's had, nurse, so try not to act too shocked.'

'Doctor will you step out here and adjust Mr. Hendrick's pacemaker?'

'The amputation went well Mr. Johnstone but we have had one slight hiccup.'

Surgeon with hearts on his shirt.

Reflex testing

"If she still feels pain with the regular placebo, we try again withe extra-strength placebo!"

'Where should I put the dirty bed linen?' 'On the beds.'